I woke up this morning, looked at the time and thought "fuck this is gonna' be a long day"
It was long. It just wouldn't end. Well it's 11pm now and I'm not tired after wanting to just sleep for the entire day. I'm trying to keep myself busy at the moment to avoid going to sleep. It's working at the moment.
Remember that person I said I was trying to avoid? (I'm pretty sure I put it here) keeps talking to me every so often. It's not that I don't enjoy talking to them, it's quite the opposite, and that's the problem. I think it'll stop in a week or so.
I've been slightly worried (well trying to get worried) about my lack of caring about anything lately. I mean I do care about people, I think. Right now I'm apathetic about everything. People, life, the future. I just don't care, living should be motivation enough, but it just really isn't. I don't know.
Dad's in hospital for a procedure, he's anemic, the doctor wanted to see if there was any internal blood leakage. I should be really worried. But I'm not bothered at all. I don't know why. I know I should care, but it's just happening, and I'm just here. Nothing. I guess I'm not all here? I don't know. I'm so confused right now.
There just doesn't seem like there's a reason, a point for being here. I'm so lost at the moment and I'm pretty sure no one will understand or care without looking at me and thinking what the fuck is wrong with him.